Processing Life and the human condition

No random existence. Without overanalysing or -spiritualising it, reflecting on what is today, how we are feeling. State of the world, left/right/center, headlines, chaos and right/wrong aside for a moment. Zooming out, and in that finding peace and more clarity.

When things seem to break down around us or speeding up; when we feel exhausted or just the amount of information we are handling is dizzying; it can be worthwhile to think again what we are doing all this for.

What are we using this Life for?

Life is finite. It may be short, it may be long – a matter of perception.

Every day our energy and attention go towards some tasks and activities, goals if we have them. On repeat, the formed habits create sort of "railways" we are moving on about.

Are any of these "railways" outdated? Do they still serve a purpose that makes us feel good about that invested energy, time and attention?

Can we tweak these today or tomorrow, so that they feed more of what we want to achieve, and more of what makes us more content and, I dare say, happy?

When large, emotionally impactful events happen in our Lives, that routine is disrupted, and we regain a fresh layer of perspective on the universal context of Life.

Life's big events like celebrating it or grieving, often inspire us to rethink and ask those Big Questions like"Am I happy?"

We can utilise those milestones for positive Change but we don't need to wait for one.

We can proactively induce a "fresh start" atmosphere so that our Mind supports the process of optimising the foundations we rest our Lives upon.

From a psychological perspective, it is recognised that times like the New Year, the beginning of the school year – even when we are long past that age but the decade long habits tied to that remain in our biology imprinted – or simply Autumn or Spring, or moving house, having accepted a new position or starting out a new chapter in whatever shape or form, help the Mind with an opening and readiness for different ways of doing things.

It anticipates change and therefore is more ready to cooperate.

We can trigger such a fresh start readiness also in the everydays by intentionally setting up a day, a date, a place as "our very own fresh start". Regardless of season and external circumstance. Though they may help.

Know thyself. Still a useful hermetic principle.

During the day when do you feel most energetic?

Which day of the week can you relax most and take time for yourself?

Which season fills you most with a renewed sense of optimism or such?

In whose company do you feel most yourself and at ease?

Who in your surroundings can challenge you to expand your Mind in healthy debates?

Use all the knowledge you have about your own preferences, to ease the process when you want to change things for the better. If unsure, get to know yourself better – experiment with those routines.

Whether or not you are fully spiritually inclined, you may work with simply "I have a gut feeling", you will sense when you feel you need a change.

If you feel an urge to learn new information...

If you feel a certain unease...

If you feel the current status quo is not fulfilling any more...

If you are just fed up with things you do or commit do that do not bring enjoyment like they might have done in the past...

What do you really want from Life?

It can feel like quite a blunt question when you are asked this question out of the blue, and you haven't allowed yourself to rethink your routines and schedule in a while...

"What do you want from Life?"

If you go beyond physical possessions and job types and partner descriptions, the answering of this question may become more effortless.

Go beyond external expectations and practical reasoning for a moment.

Just work with feelings you want to feel on an everyday basis.

What is the dominant feeling you want to wake up with every day and what mental and emotional state do you want to go to sleep every night in?

What makes you feel most free?

Which experiences make you feel most alive?

What drains you?

What can be done to tip the scale towards the rewarding energy-time-attention investments? Can start with small tweaks.

Learning phase and sources of Inspiration

At my big milestone of Change, I threw myself into learning, courses, books, consuming as much as I could on how to live more consciously.

This can help a lot with Inspiration, motivation, with inducing that "fresh start" energy. Novelty is one of the triggers for #flowstate .

But then it gets to a point where you know you need to turn away from the external input, and sit with yourself. Nobody in the Universe knows your preferences as much as you do.

That point is a very personal choice.

You can find Inspiration throughout your Journey via learning, reading, applying teachings from those you appreciate and via Mentoring as well.

There are always many things left to learn.

Remaining a lifelong learner is a common trait in people who feel accomplished. 

Applying knowledge is a measure, that helps turn things around in our Lives tangibly.

Circle back always to that overarching question that can help guide us all:

What do you want to use this lifetime for?

The key to habit formation is understanding human nature, and most of all, knowing ourselves and getting to know ourselves in the process better and better.

Our basic human drivers are evolutionary and though we can use willpower to steer our behaviour, often it's better use of energy to work with it, not against it.

The basic human drivers: away from pain and towards pleasure.

James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, stated (I'm paraphrasing):

the habits we enjoy can be upheld best long-term.

Or we know they are good for us. As an example: brushing our teeth and flossing regularly. They may not be the ultimate joy but are part of the identity of "I am and aim to be healthy".

We can add to that, that the strongest fuel for powering through personal change, is knowing WHY we are doing it.

Our Core Values and the elements of our Life Vision are encompassed in that WHY.

What else can help with the process of changing our Lives for the better?

• accountability partner(s) 

• involving the element of enjoyment

• engaging our Creativity

• verbalising our goals/talk about it

• training our Awareness of what we identify with, then our identity steers our choices

I wrote in more detail about habit formation including Flow in Blog posts, like this one 1/2. Habits for a better Life – how do we change?

and about why understanding our Vision for Life matters in this one, as an example:

Main Lessons: What is conscious living?

Most importantly, take time and space for yourself for your own answers.

They may change as seasons of Life change but the greater qualities you have found to be accompanying you for a long time and which you feel are natural part of yourself, remain steady foundations you can build on.

I add a quote here from one of the most impactful authors on personal change, Stephen R. Covey. Hopefully, it helps with the decision to invest energy and attention so that you gain further clarity on what you truly want from Life.